Waves

The past stays in the past. Yes, most of the time there are unresolved issues. But I've learned the hard way, that sometimes, there really are no answers. I'm talking about my past relationships. These are closed doors. Shut, locked, double-locked, throw away the key. So far, this has been the deal.

I've had my share of messy break-ups and cry-your-heart-out moments. A lot of them. I've embraced love's intensity because it was the kind of person that I am. I fully submerge myself in the moment. To me, that's the only way to live life. To put everything in surrender. Some might view this as a flaw, a weakness. Being ruled by the heart, almost never by the mind. So when the end of a relationship comes, an attempt to retract back to singlehood is always a battle. But both times, I survived, came out a better, smarter, stronger person. I learned a lot. I learned to accept, which gave me peace and calmed my inner storms. I learned to forgive, which allowed me to detach myself further from the past.

Heartaches and good memories in check. I no longer run from my past. To me, this is a good thing. It made me grateful for the past and optimistic of my future. Looking forward to a better life ahead, a better fit, a better plan, someone else that's perfect for me. Only if He wills it. There was a time when I have resigned myself to having been done with love and relationships. It has scared the shit out of me. To make the story short, someone came and changed my mind.

Right now, I am in a relationship with someone who has ignited my passion for life. I put my all into it and hope that it is enough. I pray that we become better people because of each other. There is still so much more to explore and I pray that he holds my hand through it all.

I think I've gotten better at riding the waves of life. I do get knocked off the board more often than not. But I get back on again and again. That's really all we can do. Hold on and do the best we can. Just keep on riding the wave, the best is yet come.